John and Lance: Lost in the Pridelands
by The Forgotten Disciple
Summary: John, and his bad tempered friend Lance, are on an expedition in Africa when they are mysteriously transformed into lions by a strange monkey and run into Simba's pride.
1. Prologue

John and Lance: Lost in the Pridelands

"True friendship is when two friends can walk in opposite directions, yet remain side by side." 

Chapter 1: Bad Tempered Friend

Dr. John Fields walked down the corridor of an office building, holding a file in his hands. He glanced at his wristwatch which read: 4:59 a.m. As he sat down in his office to search for some papers a small man came into his office and said, "Well?"

"I'm going to Africa," said John, holding the file in the air triumphantly.

"You finally got them to agree?" asked the small man.

"Sure did, David," replied John.

He found the papers he was looking for and put them in the briefcase he was carrying, then stood up and left the office, the small man trailing behind him, "I've already chose my teammate," said John.

"Who?" asked David as they went down a flight of stairs.

"Dr. Lance Williams," said John.

"Lance Williams!" gasped John, "I thought he'd been fired on account of his rage problem."

"No," replied John, "He wasn't. He's a brilliant biologist and my best friend, besides, he's been to anger management classes."

"And?" asked David, as they stopped in front of an office door.

"He's really improved," said John as he opened the door; inside they saw a tall man with black hair, blue eyes and dressed in a dust stained shirt, talking on a phone, actually he was screaming: "WHAT?" he banged the receiver on the desk twice, "You hear that?" he banged it three times against the desk this time, "BITCH!" He slammed the receiver down, ripped the whole phone off the wall and threw it out the window. He turned towards the door to see John and David,

"Ready for the expedition, Lance?" asked John.

"Yeah, yeah," said Lance as he walked past them and stepped into an elevator at the end of the hall and vanished from sight, muttering, "Bastard."

"Yeah," said John, "He's definitely improved."

"Are you sure he's the right guy for this mission?" asked David, "He could be a danger to himself and the animals."

"He's the best," said John as he stepped into a second elevator and pressed the button for the ground floor.


	2. Trouble

Chapter 2: Trouble

A jeep made its way through the open, African savanna, Lance was steering and John was trying to type something on his laptop which was not easy due to the constant bumping motions the jeep was making. John eventually gave up and stowed the laptop away in the back of the jeep, "Remind me," said Lance, "Why we're here again?"

"We're here," said John, "Because we need to study the lifestyle of the animals and try to attach tracking devices to them so we can monitor how many are killed in the wild and…"

"I know why we're here," said Lance, "I'm just trying to start a conversation.

"Let's listen to the radio," suggested John and he turned it on and kept changing stations until he stumbled across a Marc Anthony song: 'No One.'

"I love this song," said John and he relaxed his shoulders and hummed along.

"I'm not going to listen to that," said Lance and he switched the station and found Sean Paul singing 'Temperature', "Now this is a song."

"Yeah," said John, "But I was listening to Marc Anthony first," and he changed the station back.

"_I'm _the one who's driving," said Lance, and changed the station back.

John changed the station, then Lance changed it back, John changed it, Lance punched John's shoulder, John punched him back, and this went on for the next few seconds until John shouted, "LOOK OUT."

Lance looked up just in time to see a dark blur in front of the jeep and he swerved the jeep off its course and it crashed into a ditch. John quickly got out and saw a small lion cub with reddish brown fur, lying unconscious on the ground, "It's a lion cub," gasped John, "I can't believe it."

"The jeep is stuck in the ditch," said Lance, "Help me get it out."

"It's an endangered animal," said John, still staring at the cub.

"Come on, John," insisted Lance, "I'm still in trouble with that animal rights group for breaking that Pomeranian's leg."

"We can't just leave it lying there," said John.

"Yes, we can," said Lance as he began to turn around.

That was when they heard a deep growl behind them. They both froze up and looked at each other, then they turned around and were met by the sight of another lion with reddish-brown fur, but this one was fully grown with a black mane, "Oh, shit," said Lance.

"Don't worry," said John, "Male lions are pretty lazy, we have a good chance of outrunning him, it's the lionesses who are the runners."

Then, a second, larger lion came up, this one was yellow and had a red mane around his head appeared and stoop next to the other lion, "Shit," said Lance.

"It's okay," said John, although he did not sound like it was okay, "It's just another male, remember the lionesses are the runners."

Suddenly, two lionesses appeared, "The status quo has just changed," said John, "We are now officially in deep shit…what are we going to do?"

"I'm sorry," said Lance, "I don't know the lion for 'don't eat me, eat my stupid friend.'

The lions then turned to look at the unconscious cub then back at the humans, they all let out low growls which grew in volume.

"They may have the completely wrong idea about us," said John.

"I have a plan," replied Lance.


	3. The Baobab

Chapter 3: The Baobab

"OK," whispered Lance, "Just remain _absolutely _still. Don't move. Just stay there."

John's brain had extreme difficulty accepting Lance's idea, but his legs seemed more than happy to agree. His brain began to have doubts about this plan when he saw the two males approach him and the females began to circle him, "Lance," he said, "I don't think this is working…", he turned to see what he did not expect to see: Lance was more than fifty yards away and running fast, increasing the distance between himself and John,

"LANCE," shouted John, and his legs began running before he had time to think about it, "You bastard, wait up."

After they had been running for approximately 10 minutes when they came to a stop by a tree and collapsed onto the ground panting like dogs, "Where…are…the…lions?" gasped Lance.

John looked behind them, with difficulty due to the fact that his muscles where screaming with pain, "No…why…aren't…they…coming?"

"Maybe we…outran them," suggested Lance, the stitch in his side was subsiding which made it easier for him to breathe.

John punched Lance's shoulder weakly, "Asshole, you were gonna leave me out there."

"If they'd attacked you," stated Lance, "I would have come back; I would have been right behind you."

"Yes," said John, "About fifty miles behind me."

"Don't be," started Lance, but then looked up at the tree which was offering them shade from the African sun, "This is the biggest tree I have ever seen."

"Don't try to change the…" began John, but then looked up at the tree, "Holy shit, this is a large tree."

They both heaved themselves off the ground and began admiring the enormous tree, "It's a baobab," said John.

"Wow," said Lance sarcastically, "College man, right?"

They stood there for a few more minutes when Lance and John met each other at an end which seemed to have a path up to its branches, "That looks like it could provide some shelter for tonight," said John.

"I just remembered," said Lance, "The jeep!"

"What about it?" asked John.

"It's gone. We're lost. I'm gonna die," said Lance and he grabbed John's throat and pinned him to the ground, "It's all your fault. I'm gonna kill you. Then I'm gonna say it was suicide…better yet; I'm gonna say it was an accident."

Lance suddenly felt himself heaved off John and hit the hard ground. He quickly got off his feet, and was stunned to see a very strange monkey standing in front of him and John, holding a staff, "Where'd this guy come from?" asked John, rubbing his throat.

"From the tree," stated the monkey, as if the fact was completely obvious.

Lance and John just looked at him, shock in their eyes, "John," said Lance, "There is a glimmer of hope that this might all be a dream."

"You are both looking for something," said the monkey.

"Who isn't?" asked Lance.

Suddenly, Lance saw the monkey hit John over the head with the staff and jump behind Lance, "You know," started Lance, "I was gonna do that right before you…"

He was cut off and he felt himself falling and eventually hit the ground…hard.


	4. Big Trouble

Big Trouble

Lance awoke with a sharp pain in his temples, his vision was blurred and he found great difficulty in standing up…felt like waking up on Saturday morning. Lance heaved himself to his feet. He felt weird; he could not quite explain it, just weird.

"It's about time," said a voice behind him.

Lance whirled around (but found himself dizzier than ever) and almost fell over. In front of him was the monkey he vaguely remembered meeting, in fact he was not sure the encounter had really taken place, it all seemed like a dream now. Standing next to the monkey was a lion with a large mane around his head and shoulders, Lance knew he should be scared, but he felt so dizzy that he could barely walk, let alone think right. The monkey whispered something in the lion's ear and vanished back up the baobab.

"Lance," said the lion, "You've been out for the last two hours."

Lance rubbed his head; he could not remember having so much hair on his head. Lance looked at his hand…paw. Lance's brain was working slowly, but it was speeding up and rather quickly.

"Okay," said the lion, "You might feel slightly dizzy, but that should wear off, right when…"

Lance suddenly screamed in horror and stared up at the sky, still screaming. "That happens," finished the lion.

Lance kept screaming for two minutes, before collapsing on the ground, panting, "Finished?" inquired the lion.

"Yeah," panted Lance.

"You Sure?"

"I'm fine."

"Any questions?"

"Loads."

"Want to start?"

"Okay," Lance said and drew in breath, "Who are you?"

"It's me," said the lion, "John."

"John?" gasped Lance, this was turning out to be one weird day, "The monkey didn't hurt you did he?"

"Nah."

"Good, because you know I'd kill him."

"Thanks, Lance."

"Yeah, because he wouldn't give me a chance to kill you."

Lance jumped on John and attempted to strangle John, but found that he had lost his thumbs, John managed to throw Lance off him and jump to his feet. Lance attempted another jump at John, but John struck Lance in the face and managed to pin him to the ground. Lance struggled for a while , but then calmed down. "Are you calm?" asked John.

"Yeah."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Alright"

John let Lance up and they both stood, looking at each other, "Are you in your happy place?" asked John.

"Yeah," replied Lance, "The living room in front of my T.V."

"Glad to hear it," said John.

"Now will you please tell me what is going on?"


End file.
